I am back

I apologize for being MIA the last week.

Attending a professional conference in the Midwest with a so-weak-that-it-was-practically-nonexistent wifi connection limited my ability to update this blog initially. But when I got back to a high-speed-internet-driven home, things only got worse.

Jetlag coupled with inextensible deadlines and days chock-full of meetings didn’t help.

Although the week was a blur, I was constantly nagged by the little voice in my head telling me I was being negligent.

Like the house plant you see but don’t really take the time out to water …

I neglected you, my readers … and for that I am sorry.

When I started writing this blog regularly a couple of months ago, I had made a vow to update it every day sans weekends. And I had been successful, even while on vacation in May.

But this time, the resolve weakened amidst multiple demands on an overtaxed mind.

The distractions have been many; the sleeplessness profound; but this short phase of silence has helped me realize how vital this blog is for me.

I feel empty inside when I don’t write.

Numb.

Lonesome … but not lonely.

Carrying thoughts that are asphyxiated in their infancy.

Reacting to stimuli without registering anything.

Soaking, absorbing.

My mind bloated with ideas ready to burst out.

So here I am, back again, to share, debate, provoke, advise, question, and engage.

For those of you who e-mailed, called and came in person to ask if there was something wrong (“I haven’t been getting my daily e-mails from you. Everything ok?” some of you said with concern), thank you for making me feel wanted.

I appreciate your loyalty and eagerness to remain connected to this forum.

I shall not keep you waiting — and wondering — henceforth.

The week-long forced hiatus was not all in vain.

I did spend some time with friends I hadn’t seen in years, amassed new knowledge at the conference, was able to catch a few winks over the weekend, and reinvigorated my mind and body for this week.

Also, this past weekend, I watched Invictus (meaning undefeated) — a Matt Damon-Morgan Freeman biographical drama based on Nelson Mandela and his support of the Springboks, South Africa’s rugby team, that helped unite the racially-divided country. I highly recommend it.

The poem, Invictus, by William Ernest Henley, that Mandela was so inspired by, left a huge impression on me.

Henley had written it in 1875 after his foot had to be amputated due to tubercular infection.

His passion, resilience, and defiance moved me. Especially the last two lines.

I reckon it will give you some fodder for thought.

Out of the night that covers me,
Black as the pit from pole to pole,
I thank whatever gods may be
For my unconquerable soul.

In the fell clutch of circumstance
I have not winced nor cried aloud.
Under the bludgeonings of chance
My head is bloody, but unbowed.

Beyond this place of wrath and tears
Looms but the Horror of the shade,
And yet the menace of the years
Finds and shall find me unafraid

It matters not how strait the gate,
How charged with punishments the scroll,
I am the master of my fate:
I am the captain of my soul.

‘Til tomorrow,

Copyright secured by Digiprove © 2010 Mansi Bhatia

You might also enjoy:

• I appreciate you
• Civility: A golden rule
• Live long, live healthy
• Nowhere to hide

Tags: blog, blogging, inspiration, movie, poem, routine, writing

This entry was posted on July 20, 2010 at 8:23 am and is filed under personal. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed.